| Ah, Valentine's Day. The flowers. The candy. The | | | | regardless of life's circumstances. Decide what is |
| cards. The fancy schmancy dinner in a "nice" | | | | important for you. You can read the Sunday paper in |
| restaurant. Sharing one decadent dessert with two | | | | bed together while you enjoy coffee or tea together. |
| forks. The romance. The soft music. The candlelight | | | | You can go to church and breakfast together every |
| that makes everyone look amazing. How wonderful. | | | | Sunday morning. You can open a bottle of wine each |
| Then comes the rest of the year. After the flush of | | | | Friday night after work and share your favorite |
| romance on Valentine's Day, most couples soon forget | | | | moments from the week. Think of something you can |
| the sweet sentiments on the cards they exchanged | | | | do even if you are on vacation or other life events |
| and fall quickly back into their routines, which while | | | | come up. You'll soon find yourselves looking forward |
| somewhat necessary, can lead to boredom and | | | | to these special intimate moments. |
| stagnation in the relationship in a hurry. | | | | - Begin a "love journal." Write notes for each other in a |
| To avoid falling into that boredom and stagnation in | | | | book that you leave for the other to find: on his pillow, |
| your relationship, try taking an approach written about | | | | at her place at the dinner table, on the driver's seat of |
| by Bill O'Hanlon, author of Do One Thing Different. | | | | his car, in her bedroom closet. What would you write? |
| Change one aspect of your relationship and notice | | | | Anything at all! Share your thoughts about an upcoming |
| how powerful even a small, seemingly inconsequential | | | | holiday, describe in vivid detail how you felt when you |
| change can be. According to O'Hanlon, "Although not | | | | first met, re-live a moment from your honeymoon, |
| everything is in your control, you do have the power to | | | | explain your position about a recent disagreement, |
| make your life better. The smallest changes in your life | | | | write a list of the top 10 things you love about each |
| can move you in the right direction." | | | | other. Whatever you can dream up, you can write in |
| Here are some some small things you can change | | | | your love journal. Remember that the purpose is to |
| about your relationship that will keep those Valentine's | | | | draw you closer together. |
| Day romantic feelings going all year long. By the way, | | | | - Thank your spouse regularly. By offering a simple |
| many of these tips are inexpensive or even free, so | | | | verbal thank you reminds your spouse that you do not |
| they work for even the tightest budgets! | | | | take everything s/he does for granted. When he |
| - Send each other free e-cards or virtual flowers on a | | | | prepares a delicious meal, thank him for it. When she |
| regular basis. Websites like and have developed a | | | | works long hours at the office to land a big client, thank |
| great way to have potential on-line customers | | | | her for working so hard. When he takes out the |
| experience their business: by offering free products | | | | garbage, when she pays the bills - make sure your |
| delivered via email. Another plus is these services | | | | spouse knows how grateful you are by saying so. |
| offer a wide variety of options to choose from, so you | | | | - What ideas can you think of that would work for |
| can send a funny or sentimental card or a photo of a | | | | injecting more romance into your everyday life? |
| beautiful bouquet or a fat-free box of virtual | | | | Remember, all you need to do is change one small |
| chocolates! Start and end each day with the words, "I | | | | thing to soon notice some big rewards. So instead of |
| love you." By making this simple but profound | | | | only having to look forward to the flush of romance |
| expression of your feelings on a regular basis, your | | | | Valentine's Day offers, you can have the entire year |
| partner will continue to be reminded just how important | | | | look forward to! If you have more ideas, send them to |
| s/he is to you. | | | | © Felicia Slattery, 2007. |
| - Create a standing date that you never miss, | | | | |